With the UFC shutting down indefinitely on Thursday, we are now guaranteed to be without major MMA action for who knows how long. It could be a month if Dana White gets his way, but it’s likely to be longer than that if the global coronavirus pandemic doesn’t tail off soon.

And so, what do we do without fights? We dream. You know what would be nice? If, when the UFC comes back, the promotion satisfies starved MMA fans with an epic weekend. Conor McGregor, Khabib Nurmagomedov, Tony Ferguson, Jorge Masvidal, Daniel Cormier, Stipe Miocic, Israel Adesanya, Amanda Nunes, Valentina Shevchenko … just book them all for a three-day weekend of action Coachella style.

Speaking of Coachella, the iconic music festival was supposed to kick off this weekend. On Friday, a Twitter user who goes by Ariel Helvani (with a “v”) blessed us with this Coachella-inspired UFC poster:

Just look at all those amazing matchups. But also, I can’t stop laughing at the fine print! In addition to fights, there’s also:

  • Leon Edwards Sadly Watching Covington vs. Masvidal
  • African American History With Mike Perry
  • B.J. Penn vs. Drunken Hawaiian Off The Street
  • The Evolution of Dance Presented By Holly Holm and Mini Blessed Holloway
  • Kevin Lee Fitting Into All This
  • Tony Ferguson Fighting Again Because He’s The Type Of Guy To
  • The Joe Rogan Experience Live With Nate Diaz & A Lot Of Marijuana

Well done, Mr. Helvani.

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